TCAI – Part II

I’ve decided that I should update the information based on my previous breakdown of the four male archetypes. If you missed the first part of this, click here for “TCAI Deconstructed” to learn more.

The general breakdown was to acknowledge that there are roughly four predominant types of Asian men. Each Asian male has a unique blend of all four types, but one of them is usually dominant. This is definitely not to say that an Asian male must permanently remain as one type. To change requires some time, but definitely can be done.

The numbers game

As you would expect, the illustration created before was to reflect the relative proportion of the male archetypes. The most popular would be the technophiles. When I speak of technophiles, it is just a general statement of our association with technology and knowledge. We love the latest gadgets, video games, computers, cars, and others things related to electronics really because there’s this intuition. Things just made sense. This also applies to many other fields math and natural science related. Their technical knowledge is astounding.

Unfortunately the biggest drawbacks would be their lack of athleticism and social skills.  If you don’t mind sharing the occasional geeky moment with them, by choosing a technophile you will be rewarded with an extremely loyal and generous partner.

With the comedians, these are the extroverts of the Asian bunch. There is nothing more they like other than to be loved by others. With their strength of humor, they have this natural ability to have people gravitate towards them. They are easy to approach, yet very playful in their words.  What you will also notice in this group is their loyal following of mainstream luxury brands. They are always trendy, and have this fresh approach to their style. There is this natural confidence to them that women find attractive.

However, sometimes being a White Female you may question their methods. Since he is so outgoing, sometimes it’s difficult to get his attention while at social gatherings. The way he treats one female is almost identical as another.  Somehow the lines become blurred between a friend and someone he has a deep romantic interest with. Your job as the White Female is to reel him into reality and make sure he remembers who you are. Either play second fiddle or show him who is boss.

The final two ambitious and individuals are uncommon and rare respectively. Most encounters with Asian men are technophiles or comedians, but when you do run into the ambitious or individual you will be in for a surprise.

Ambitious Asian men can be spotted easily.  Unlike their comedian counterparts, ambitious Asian men have strong goals outlined for them. Instead of being loved, they want to be respected and revered. The ambitious have spent years slaving away at education and careers, so they believe they have every right to reap the benefits of their hard work. You will find them always arriving late to parties with the intent of being noticed by everyone as they proudly walk in.  Yes they are confident, but it often it is misunderstood as cockiness or down right brash arrogance. Sometimes you will sense an elitist tone, but only because they place such strong expectations on themselves, and really hope that everyone also does the same. These men dislike being dominated, and the occasional ego stroke is as good as a back rub. While this may not be the ideal matchup for everyone, it is a wild and exciting ride.

If you happen to meet the individual archetype, you may be how unique he truly is. This type of guy is just like no other. He clearly has his own identity, choices of words, and means of expression. He doesn’t live to be loved or respected, but does things to understand himself and the entire world. In a sense, he wants to progress society, or bring about change. Being outgoing or reserved is absolutely of no relevance to them. Usually they have found one form of media to express themselves. These kinds of guys can make trends before the mainstream adopt it years later. What this type of Asian male really needs is to be acknowledged as unique, and needs the freedom to express. At worst he may be engrossed in his mode of expression, but he truly loves what he does, and he loves you even more because you enable him to be with the things and people he loves.

The bottom line: Find out what kind of Asian male you’re attracted to and give him what he needs.

2 Responses to TCAI – Part II

  1. Tara says:

    So, any advice specifically on how to attract a technophile type? For some strange reason, I really admire guys who excel at tech related things. Probably because I suck with computers and opposites attract I suppose? The problem is I’m not quite sure how to attract them since I’m more of a history/humanities/social science type nerd. I’m not really into the technophile geekiness like video games, anime, etc. Somehow I find it attractive, although I’m not into it myself….kind of hard to explain. Also, where do these guys tend to congregate in their post-college years? And I’m curious as to what you think of the potential of internet dating when it comes to amwf relationships.

    • AMWF Love says:

      Hi Tara,

      Thanks for posting your comments on our AMWF Love blog. I really appreciate the fact that you have the courage to ask these questions. It’s definately not easy at all for an Asian Male to express feelings like this without feeling embaressed and uncomfortable. The nice thing about being attracted to the Techophile Archetype is that you have a large population of Asian Men to choose from, but it comes to the price of an extensive filtering process. As a precautionary note, opening the doors by letting people know you are interested in Asian men is like opening the floodgates. You may be overwhelmed with the selection.

      Every woman wants to be loved and cared for. What you like about these types of men is their big heart, without an ounce of arrogance in their character. Unfortunately I would say the biggest drawback to this Archetype is that you really have to take the intitative. Since they excel in the rational, technological aspects of life, they tend to have a bimodal thought process. Things are interpreted as: true or false, black and white, or yes/no. These men tend to congregate with others of similar interest. Often outside of school it is just restaurants, kareoke, or at someone’s house. Now what makes this difficult is that it sort of locks out foreigners from the group – they just tend to stick together.

      Meeting online is another viable option, but be warned, it may lead to very superficial relationships. It really does depend on your location as well. In North America, you will also have greater chances of meeting the more Westernized ones, while in Asia you will meet the locals there. Meeting online can be a hit or miss, but definately allows you filter through men quicker. What’s really important is that you have to find out your own identity, and know what kind of man you are looking for. Yes it can be a stringent criteria if you choose, but you are looking out for yourself – making sure the one you give your heart out to doesn’t crush it. If work or school is not an option, then you could choose to meet through interest groups or clubs (events, conventions, or gatherings). The main thing is not to be discouraged – identify your must haves, and must have-nots.

      Don’t give up and keep trying!

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