Standards of Beauty in Asia and the West: How much do Asian Men Care?

I have noticed that many Asian women are insecure about their physical appearance, far more so than their Western counterparts. There seems to be a heavy amount of social pressure to be extremely thin and to meet that I see as nearly unattainable standards of beauty. They seem to be reminded constantly by parents and friends, not just by the usual commercial advertisements. These standards of female attractiveness include a desired height, oval faces, thinness, pale complexion, and absence of freckles, all very typical of Asia. But what I find also interesting is that Asian women also are preferred to have large eyes with eyelids, and a pronounced bridge of the nose, making them have more Western or Eurasian features. In the quest to attain these features many women undergo cosmetic surgical procedures such eyelid surgery, and nose jobs. They also use skin whiteners on a regular basis for clear, white or pale skin, and they avoid exposure to the sun whenever possible.

Think about it, that’s billions of dollars spent annually on cosmetic surgery and products to meet this standard! It’s not to say that the west does not also spend billions a year on cosmetics, because we do. Perhaps cosmetics surgery is a bit less likely to occur for the average women though. In a society with a collectivist mentality, it seems that this becomes a focus for all women in Asia whether they would like it to or not. In my family no one has undergone theses types of procedure (that I know of) and that could be due to the fact that here in America we just do not place as much emphasis on looking like everyone else. But what I do see here is that Asian women often place value of material goods, such as clothing, shoes, and expensive purses. In some ways I feel like Asian women are just raised to place so much value in how they look, how they appear to others, and it produces, terribly pampered, spoiled, and narcissistic personalities.

When I ask Asian men, who like white women, what they think of this they all give me the same response. “That’s why I don’t date Asian women.” Of course there are plenty of women in the US and around the world that also place a high value on materialist goods. It is just human nature to want the best, and I do not mean to imply all women of any race feel a particular way. But the fact remains that in a collectivist society beauty can really only come in one shape or form and that conformity must be extremely difficult deal with.

With this kind of pressure for Asian women to look a certain way, White women naturally question their own looks. They have asked me if I feel that Asian men would prefer if they had a more Asian look to them. Should they have dark hair, straight hair, dark eyes, or wear Asian fashions? Women, no matter what race, age, or society always seem to constantly questions there appearance and seek validation for it. Oddly enough the answer Asian men always give me is that they like the unique physical features of western women. They like blue, green, gray, or brown eyes. They don’t care if your 5 ft or 5ft 7inches tall. They don’t care if you have tanned skin, freckles, or a pure white skin.

Bottom line, they don’t really care, they love the diversity and do not want women to try and be something they are not.I think it’s important to remember, that Asian men who are not interested in a collectivist type of society, are also not looking for women who would embrace that mentality.They do not hold white women to a certain standard of beauty, other then to what they personally feel is attractive to them. So I need to ask the question, why do women try so hard? Why do we try and be something that we are not in order to attract men, when Asian (or otherwise) men clearly don’t care that much. If anyone has that answer I would like to hear it!