Why Do I Support the AMWF Relationship?
March 10, 2011 17 Comments
I get this question all the time. Why do you care so much about the AMWF relationship? Why do you care enough to help Asian men, and western women who are looking for relationships? What’s the motivation? It takes time, effort, and does not offer you much compensation, so what’s the deal? You have to be thinking, it’s because you’re in a relationship with an Asian man right? Or, you watch lots of k drams, anime, kung fu movies, and you are just a crazy lady with an Asian fetish?! Actually none of those are reasons why.
When it came to a relationship choice, for me I was always attracted to Asian men. It’s just my preference, but I never expected anyone else to feel the same way. When it came to a life style choice, a way of living, I just found that I liked what eastern cultures had to offer and again it was not something that I expected anyone else to agree with. It was just what I felt was right for me, something that I believed in, and something that I wanted to be part of. To me supporting the AMWF relationships means more then just supporting an interracial couple, but it’s about supporting tolerance and acceptance for one another.
I think that the eastern and western cultures can work very well together. Everything from the way you raise your kids, the foods you eat, the way you dress, behave, and live your life. It can all blend together so beautifully because we can take the best that both have to offer.What concerns me is that people still see race as a barrier when it comes to relationships, and it really should not be that way at all. Maybe there are lots of people who still and always will, use race as an excuse to not treat others with love and respect, but I won’t live my life like that. In my mind we are all humans and therefore no matter what color our skin, the way our eyes slant, or the where we live on this earth, we are all equal. I think we can be better, with more tolerance and understanding then the previous generations. We can all live and respect each other for our similarities and our differences.
So if you’re like me and you want your partner to be Asian that’s fine, If you’re an Asian man and you want to be in a relationship with a white women, that’s fine also. In the end it all comes down to who you are as a person, and nothing else should really matter.
AMWF Love 
My hubby is Chinese (born Vietnam) we have almost four kids together. I will tell you now, that it is not easy! At first it was all love blah blah blah, but as you live your life things you thought would never matter do! Like the fact that he doesn’t really care for American food. Now what/ I can’t cook ANY THING, for the family that I grew up with, not that I don’t like Asian food, I do, but it would be nice for us all to sit down for some spaghetti now and then!
I hope that your readers will realize that being with someone of a different culture is thrilling or whatever, but when it comes down to it, it is NOT easy. :0)
That’s very unfortunate. I’m surprised you didn’t find that out about him before you got serious or married. These kinds of things happen in any relationship. You have to be able to live with the person and accept things or move on before a big commitment.
My fiance is from Vietnam. We have been together a long time and know enough about each other to agree marriage will work. We eat Vietnamese sometimes, American sometimes, Korean sometimes etc. When my parents cook Italian, he would never turn it down. It all boils down to getting to know a person first.
LOL of course I knew about it! But didn’t think it would matter much…and in the long run it doesn’t, it’s one of those annoying things you live with. But, ya, it matters a little when I feel inadequate to make my man a meal!
I do have to say that as time has gone on, He has become a little better, like for instance the other day he tried a taco…and I think he liked it, but with him if he doesn’t have something with rice he just doesn’t feel full…
oh my god i am the same as the reader above. I am not a good cook at all. unless I start following recipe books. Also my husband is a chef, also Chinese. So yea we almost always eat chinese or asian style food when were together. Sometimes I like to eat Lasange, Pastas chips lol. These days we mix pasta with chinese food which is weird but takes good.
But I think yea you could say dating an asian guy is a life style choice. Theres lots of new things to get used to, like food, not wearing shoes in the house blah blah. But at the end of the day. I think it can be totally normal. Just a boy and a girl in love.
A lot of Canadians don’t wear shoes in the house either. Probably because of the winter season. I’m pretty sure of this because my Caucasian friends do that as well.
The thing with Chinese food is that there is an apparent lack of dairy and decadent richness to our food. Although it does vary by region, you will still find many Asians that have lactose intolerance. (maybe that’s why we’re shorter) My parents orginate from Hong Kong, and people there do not like their food spicy at all because it burns the taste of all the fresh coastal seafood. That’s different for Northern China where seafood isn’t as easily accessible.
As far as I remember, KFC is the fast food favourite in China – as is Pizza Hut? I went to a Pizza Hut in Hong Kong, and it was totally different. Obeasity is becoming a concern in China as well – it’s a shame that we have no idea on how to portion control because we eat family style all the time.
In the end it does’t really matter much if you’re both in love. 🙂
– Brian
It’s definitely a wonderful experience for me. I don’t see it as things to “get used to” more like things to learn and grow from.
The thing that gets me about my
” Lao Gong” is that he almost always says “Ewwww” when I cook anything American…now come on it’s not “EWWW” lol @_@
Well it’s fair game if it’s very unhealthy. Junk food or really greasy artery clogging food that is like a week’s worth of cholesterol.
Otherwise tough luck for your husband – if he doesn’t know how to cook, then American food it is. 🙂
– Brian
I have not been on this website long, but this is the best commentary I have read thus far. It is personal and yet easy for anyone to relate to. I prefer Asian men, and enjoy the culture. I do not agree with a lot of things and that is OK, but I most things are wonderful and rewarding for me.
Thank you for sharing
I concur!
A lot of people in Europe as well dont enter with shoes on.In both of my counties its really rude to do so.Now I have lived in Ireland,England,Australia and lots of people there just go in with they shoes without asking u if its ok.I find that terribly annoying to have to be the one to tell them off with the shoes.I feel then that Im makeing them uncomfortable plus that I have to go on my knees later and scrub where they have walked because I cant sleep and obsess about it.I have dicussed this with other Swedish people and we all wonder the same thing,a) how can u have small children crawling on the floor, b)what if u have expencive dark polished wooden floor and someone has high heels,it would leave marks on the floor and damage it.I cant of course ask this to people who have this habbit because Im affraid to offend them or even worst hurt they feelings but the reason Im bringing it up is that I absolutly love that Asian people dont go in with they shoes.This may not be huge deal for others but its a major deal for me.I can see my dark wooden floors intact and I can always tell people that its because of my husband they cant enter with shoes on and that way Im not risking hurting they feelings or makeing them uncomfortable.A huge plus 🙂
Well if they really want to wear shoes in the house, maybe you could have multiple sets of slippers available at the front door. It’s a compromise. 🙂
– Brian
Wow…your post is a great read. I love it when white females actually tune into Asian guys–it’s completely against the media’s portrayal of Asians, and I love it.
I’ve been quite busy but I’m excited to read more of your intriguing posts….thanks once again for raving about Asian men:)
Thanks Romantic Asian Guy!
If you have any specific requests, Laura and I could probably write something about it for you.
– Brian
Great post, great blog. Here’s a couple of questions I’d like to see addressed eventually. From a couple of earlier posts, I get the impression that Laura may have had some negative experiences with Korean guys (who I guess have kind of a reputation). Could you maybe talk a little about your own personal history with Asians (without getting too personal of course)? And here’s a question for Brian: Did the fact that Laura already had a strong preference for Asian guys affect your relationship? I can see how it could be both a positive and a negative thing. Thanks!
Well Phu,
To tell you the truth, Laura and I are not romantically involved with each other. She is already happily married and I am co-writing this blog with her. Laura’s husband is extremely supportive and caring. 🙂
I met Laura purely by coincidence. It was just a couple months after parting ways with a woman whom I was introduced through friends (compatibility didn’t work). Yes I have my fair share of relationships that didn’t work out too. Just by chance I happened to stumble and find Laura’s YouTube page. I contacted her, and wrote my “Great Divide” composition to her. Anyways she responded and asked if I wanted to start a blog, I agreed and the rest is history.
Having a Caucasian female with a strong preference to Asian guys has its ups and downs. Yes she does like Asian Males, but you have to find out why they really like Asian Guys. Is it because of a perceived fantasy of them (appearances, K-Dramas, Anime, etc) or something realistic (respect, family values, etc). It really depends on what kind of relationship you are looking for. 🙂
In all honesty, the real lifelong relationships are truly based on love. He just happened to be Asian, and she just happened to be Caucasian.
– Brian
What a great “coincidence”, I’m having a field day reading all these articles heheh! Yes, actually, I don’t have a prefference towards Asian guys, I just met the ONE that I just love and adore. On the other hand, I love Chinese Culture BECAUSE fot the family values. etc.